Amnesia is killer
by underpaid4
Summary: Set a year after season 5. What would happen if Dexter suffers from amnesia? Rated M for language, adult themes and situations.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: This is my first fan fiction so I apologize now for any mistakes that are present. Please keep this in mind when leaving your reviews. Also I must state now that I own none of the characters even though I really wish I did.

Summary: This is set about a year after season 5 so there are or will be spoilers for seasons 1-5 and bits of season 6. So if you haven't seen them stop reading now. Dexter gets injured and sustains massive head trauma. What happens when a serial killer forgets who he is? There will be Dexter/Deb pairing since after I saw it in season 6 I immediately agreed with it. In this story Deb has broken up with Quinn and realized her feelings for Dexter already.

* * *

"If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything." - Mark Twain

* * *

Dexter's POV

All I want to do is sleep. I haven't gotten any in days due to Harrison's recent fight against the flu. But he's finally sleeping quietly now, hopefully I soon will too. I climb into my loving bed and close my eyes when I hear the absolute worst sound on earth. My cell phone is ringing. I look at the cursed device and see that it is Deb who is calling me.

"Deb why do you clearly hate me, what have I done? It's two in the morning" I say as kindly as I can but am really annoyed.

"Sorry Dex but we're going to need you. We're finally going to bust that sick bastard Jameson." Deb states as sympathetically as she can even though I can hear the smile she no doubt has on her face. Jameson is a serial rapist who graduated to homicide, he was a potential table play mate but due to Harrison's illness I haven't been as on the ball lately.

"Why on earth would you need me for a bust? Harrison is finally sleeping I can't leave him here alone." It's shameful to use your children in such a way but I desperately need sleep.

Deb answers just the way I'd expect. "We need you to collect any blood evidence you know Masuka is pretty useless when it comes to blood. Not to mention we may shoot this fucker and we'll need you anyway. Just call up the babysitter and stop being such a bitch. I'll text you the address."

I let out a groan of annoyance. "Fine, I'll be there in like a half an hour." We say our goodbyes and I proceed to get dressed and call the babysitter. At least there isn't any traffic I muse as I drive to the location of Deb's text.

Just as I had said I arrived on scene within the half an hour time limit I had set. I see that they were still getting ready to breach the residence of Jameson. I see Deb talking to two officers dressed up like SWAT guys. Masuka comes up to me and goes on a rant about how crappy it is that we need to be there and something about twins. I tune him out so much of the time it's impressive that I got that much info out of what he just said.

"Hey socio," a voice calls from behind me I recognize it to be Angel's. "Sorry about needing you here but this couldn't wait, we have reason to believe this guy's a flight risk."

I spot Deb coming up to our little group she's been acting so weird around me lately. Did she just make eye contact and then look away. She's trying to overt her gaze, what did I do?

"Alright Batista we're going in," she states still not meeting my gaze.

I watch as they get in position to breach the small ugly yellow house. It is amazing how they move together at once, like a perfect symphony, each one complementing the other. I don't understand why there are only four officers including Deb and Batista. I guess that it's a rather busy night which makes sense since it's a Friday night in Miami but still just four people seems to really be under staffing it.

Warning bells started going off in the back of my mind. The dark passenger warns me to be vigilant. Something is very wrong. All of a sudden gun shots ring out. I stop thinking if Deb dies I'll be lost. Masuka gets on one of the police radios and calls for help. I however stupidly run to the house. I'm blinded by my worry for Deb. I cannot think so I allow my dark passenger to take care of reacting for me. I decide to go through the back of the house.

When I get to the house I find one of the officers down, he's unconscious. It looks like the bullet entered his upper arm and nicked his brachial artery, I take off my belt and use it as a tourniquet, as best I can tell he hit his head pretty bad when he fell from the shot and was knocked unconscious. I take his service pistol after all he isn't going to need it. The poor guy is going into shock so I as quickly as possible drag him back to the street and tell Vince. I make my way back and slowly enter the house, I'm careful to not make a sound. My eyes adjust quickly to the dark there are a few perks to being a monster that goes bump in the night. I see Batista in the corner of the kitchen he's conscience and muttering something in Spanish.

"Socio, you need to get out of here," he whispers fiercely at me.

"How many are there and where's Deb?" is my response as I kneel down next to him. There is no way I'm leaving.

"Just that hijo de punta he's wearing all black we didn't see him. Deb is on the other side of the house." Angel seems really worried, I look at his wound he has one bullet hole in his right thigh not far from the femoral artery but enough distance. The other is in his right shoulder, he should be fine but he's definitely out of commission. The bleeding is minimal so there's no need for any make shift bandages at the moment. Jameson clearly knows not to mess around too much with the vests.

"Masuka is calling for backup. Keep pressure on the wound on your leg you should be fine. I have to find Deb. Can you get back on your own?"

"I think I can, I crawled from the back of the house this far." That's all I needed to hear I start to leave and as I do I hear the sergeant whisper good luck as I round a corner into a hall way. There are four doors, no sound and no light.

I slowly open the first door I come to I'm struck by a sense of dread as I see a young officer dead only a few feet from the entry way. I see the distinct bullet wound in his neck, it's clear from the angle that the officer didn't see this guy coming. I keep moving I need to keep moving. I hear a scream come from the back of the house, it's Deb. My mind quickly remembers that the guy that we had come to bust is a sadistic rapist. I am filled with nothing but anger as I think of the things that he may be doing to my sister. I stupidly rush to where the scream had come from.

I burst through the door to see that Deb is handcuffed to a bed post she's still fully clothed thank goodness so at least she hasn't been assaulted. He's already started beating her, she has a black eye and her lip is bleeding. Her eyes widen when she sees me. She yells behind you. I can't hear her, I can't hear anything. I feel a pain in my side. I look down to see that I'm bleeding from my stomach. I've been shot. Deb is yelling and crying, she's trying to get free to help me but she can't. I drop the gun I was holding.

I become angry. No one hurts my family and gets away with it. If I am going to die and this prick is going to orphan my son then he isn't going to walk out of here either. I turn to see the Jameson standing a few feet behind me the gun lowered and a wide sick smile on his face. With a speed I can't believe I tackle him and his gun goes flying to the other side of the room close to Deb but not quite in reach. She tries to kick it towards herself.

We exchange blows back and forth, neither of us getting the upper hand. I'm getting weaker, my vision is getting blurry I wonder if I'll go to hell when death finally comes. But I am not going to give up until Deb is safe. Harrison will need her. Jameson gets hold of a bat and hits me in the leg. For a moment the pain causes me to stumble back. This gives him an opportunity that he has to take. I see the bat go into the air and come towards my head. I can't react fast enough. Then there is nothing.

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Deb's POV

"Dexter!" I scream I can't believe what I just saw. That sick fucker just hit Dexter over the head, and Dex is on the ground. He's not moving. I need to save him. I need to do something. Jameson is getting ready to hit him again. I finally am able to kick the sick bastard's gun towards myself and in reach. As he is about to bring that bat down onto Dexter's head I shoot the fucker three times in the chest. He stumbles backward and falls to the ground.

A few minutes later some patrol men come running in followed by some paramedics. Police always are the priority for medical personal and they're fussing over me, I yell at them that I'm fine and to save my brother that he's a hero. Eventually they listen to me and get him onto a stretcher.

It's been a week. A week since my brother saved my life, Angel's, and officer Hernandez. A week since I talked him into coming to that fucking bust. I haven't left his side I had to have the babysitter come and drop off Harrison; we've been taking twelve hour shifts with him. I have him during the night since for the most part he just sleeps. The hospital was nice enough to allow us to have a small crib for him in Dexter's room. I however sleep in a piece of shit fuck of a chair. Sometimes when I hold his hand he squeezes it back. The doctors said that it doesn't mean anything.

The doctors, I'm starting to believe that they're sadists. They look sympathetic when they talk to me about his condition but never give me any good news. Even if they do they mask it with bad news. They say things like 'well he has minimum trauma to his temporal and occipital lobe' then they cover it up with 'but he may never wake up.' One even had the audacity two days into the comma to ask me when I'd pull the plug and if I'd donate his organs.

Surprisingly LaGuerta has been nice to me about this, they've given me two weeks off with pay and they aren't even marking it against my sick or vacation days. They are talking about giving Dexter or me a medal, I don't want one. But Dex deserves it. He fucking really needs to wake up now. I swear when he wakes up I'm going to tell him how I feel about him. I curl up in the chair and fall asleep I'm still holding his hand.

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Dexter's POV

My head hurts. There's an annoying beeping sound. I'm going to turn off whatever that is. Why is it so hard to open my eyes? I feel stiff my muscles hurt too. Did I go out drinking or something last night? I open my eyes. Where am I? It looks like a hospital room, there's a crib in the corner, and there's a woman sleeping in a chair. She's holding my hand, she seems so familiar. I wonder who she is. I wonder who I am. I'm wearing a wedding ring perhaps she's my wife. I spot two wallets on the table next to me I carefully turn to not wake her. The movement hurts my stomach but I succeed in my action and retrieve both wallets. I open the bigger one first, to discover a man staring back at me. I look around the room and see from the reflective surface that this is me. "Dexter Morgan," I whisper to myself. I open the other wallet and discover the woman is Debra Morgan so she is probably my wife, I doubt anyone else would be so devoted.

I briefly allow myself to entertain thoughts of our marriage and what it must be like including some husbandly thoughts of the attractive young woman next to me. It makes sense she seems so familiar and I seem to have fond feelings for her. All of a sudden the crib makes sense to me since a squeal like cry is heard. I look to see a young boy pointing to me and smiling. I remember him, he's my son his name is Harrison. I smile back. He starts saying "da da" and jumping up and down unable to conceal his joy to see me awake.

The woman or Deb I suppose suddenly wakes up startled with a "Mother….fudge." Apparently trying to edit herself around the child she goes over to him and picks him up. Tries to settle him down which she eventually does and he falls back asleep. I'm struck by the sheer beauty of the scene before me. She moves effortlessly with him, just as a mother should. Yep she's definitely my wife. There's no other explanation.

After she sets him down in the crib she turns around and sees me smiling softly at her.

"Holy fuck Dexter!" she whisper yells not wanting Harrison to wake up again. She has a huge smile on her face as she runs across the room to me. She wraps her arms around me in a gentle but serious hug. "You scared the fuck outta me."

I hug her back with my weak response of "I'm sorry." It sounds more like a whisper I sound even weaker than I feel. "What happened?" I croak out.

"You don't remember?" she asks as she pulls back to look into my eyes. "You saved my life Dex, that sick fuck Jameson killed officer Tenpenny, injured Hernandez and Angel. Not to mention was going to do god knows what to me. You just came in got Angel out, found me and fought that sick son of a bitch after he shot you to save me. You have been in a comma for about a week now." She pauses after a minute still looking very worried. "What is the last thing you remember?"

"Nothing," is my pathetic response. "I don't remember anything, I remember that Harrison is my son and that's it. I had to look at my wallet to find out my name."

Her eyes fill with fear and worry, but she speaks very soothingly to me "Okay well I'll get the doctor maybe it'll all come back to you in a day or two." She gives me a small weak smile.

Before she leaves the room I have to ask, "Am I a good husband?" She appears to have been beaten around a bit and I do feel a fondness for her I'd hate to think I did that to her.

She seems very confused by the question, so I explain. "You seem very familiar, you were holding my hand, how you are with Harrison, I looked at your ID too and we have the same last name. I feel like I love you so I'm worried that I gave you those bruises. Am I a good husband to you or am I an abusive jerk?" I say as softly as I can if I am abusive I don't want to scare her or be any longer.

She seems shocked, confused, and happy? "Dex, we're not married. You didn't give me these bruises, Jameson did before you came looking for me. You're my foster brother." She looks like she has more to say but I'm a bit too in shock to respond or rather further question her, instead I keep flashing back to my thoughts of her just moments before. The day dreams still seem so right, how could they of been so wrong? She leaves the room and returns with some doctor who proceeds to tell me that my memories may come back in bits or not at all.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Thank you to everyone that has read the first chapter, as soon as I finished it I found myself writing this one. Once again I apologize for any mistakes that I may make, I don't have a beta so if anyone interested at all please message me. Huge thank you to Brian Stentzel for giving me my first review I hope that the story lives up to your hopes for it.

I decided that for this story Dexter is only about a year older than Deb.

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Deb's POV

Holy fuck on a cracker, did Dexter just ask if we were married? He doesn't remember anything. What the fuck. I still need to tell him how I feel but how am I supposed to do that now that he doesn't even know who I am or who he is? The doctor is explaining in a horribly boring way that Dex may never get his memories back. I tune back in from my inner freak out to hear that he can go back home sometime tomorrow night.

I realize it is the same jerk that tried to get me to pull the plug only days ago. "Sometimes doing things that are familiar or being around familiar people can trigger memories, or even sights or smells. It may come back in bits and pieces, all at once, or never at all." See what I mean about doctors? Dex wakes up out of a comma and this guy has to focus on that he may never get back his memories. Okay, I officially dislike this fucker. He actually just said he's happy to see Dex awake. After the doctor leaves I realize that I have to talk to Dex. But luckily he beats me to it.

"Deb, will you tell me about me?" He says with a small smile and clear amusement in his voice, I think it's a bit ridiculous too so I find myself letting out a small giggle.

"Well Dexter," I really don't know where to begin "you like hockey, your favorite color is red, you are a neat freak, and you're an amazing father and brother."

Dex just smiles he seems really amused by all this. I wonder if he's just fucking with me. After another minute he asks if I can get him some Tylenol or morphine since his head and stomach are really starting to bother him. I get up from my best friend the piece of crap chair and squeeze his hand giving him a weak smile as I go to find a nurse.

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Dexter's POV

Deb squeezed my hand and all of a sudden we're seventeen again. Well I'm seventeen and she's about sixteen.

I'm watching her like I always do. She's crying from some fight she just had with her boyfriend, I think they broke up. I don't like it when she cries. It makes me sad, nothing else makes me sad but when Deb cries. I hear a crash come from the backyard but Deb and I are the only ones home. So I go to the kitchen window to investigate the sound only to discover her ex-boyfriend drunk and looking menacing with a baseball bat. I smile at the challenge, he's bigger and stronger than I am but it would be so easy to take him out. If not for hurting Deb, than just to watch the blood flow it would be so easy. But I can't do it Harry would not approve when he'd come home.

The guy is now yelling out every profanity you can imagine at Deb trying to get her to come out of the house. When he calls her a cunt I become rather angry and step outside. Apparently Deb was content in the house as long as I was there too. But as soon as she heard the back door close she appeared at the window to see what I was doing. I calmly approach the idiot and tell him to leave now. He laughs at me and tells me to 'fuck off' and 'get Deb to come out and play' I don't move I stare him down. The absolute truth is that I wasn't so much staring him down as I was wrestling with the dream of killing him. I have a knife in my back pocket it would be too easy to slice through his jugular. No I can't do it. It would be far too messy, Deb is watching, and I have no clean up plan. I take a step closer to him and with all the menace that I and the dark passenger possess hiss "leave now." Then another step followed by another up until I'm about a foot from the creep.

At this Deb point comes running out of the house and stands in between us. She asks him to leave to which he responds with calling her a dumb bitch and some other demeaning comments that are only making me see blood red. Then he did the stupidest thing imaginable. He backhands Deb. That was it. That was all it took for me to completely loose control. Everything Harry had taught me about keeping my cool was gone. By the time Deb hit the ground my fist had met his face.

I proceeded to punch him again and again. I soon found myself on top of him beating his face into a pulp. I heard nothing else but my heart beat and I felt nothing but joy that this piece of crap was in pain. I was so engulfed by anger that I forgot about my pocket knife and didn't think that it would be easier to just strangle him. There was nothing but using my fists to enact the most amount of pain humanly possible. Then out of nowhere I heard an angel. Deb had been yelling at me to stop, telling me that I was better than this, and that he wasn't worth it. So I stopped simply because she asked me to.

I got up and she guided me into the house locking the door behind her. She very quietly took my hands and cleaned the blood off them. Then still without saying a word attended to the few cuts that I had and finally finished up by putting some ice on my hands. She looked up into my eyes for a long moment and said "Thank you Dexter, but never do that again." My puzzlement by this apparently was quite clear since she further explains. "He wasn't worth you getting hurt, there's nothing that is worth that to me."

At that moment I realized how close we are, and the gap between us seems to be closing. I can feel her breath on my face, her pupils are dilated and our breathing has increased. All of a sudden I find that we're kissing. It's better than any other kiss I've had before, there's something _more _to it. The kiss is getting deeper her arms are around me and mine are around her. The world seems right. This seems like it is right, normal, how it should be. I hear the front door unlock, Harry is home. We break the kiss and stare into each other's eyes a long sad moment. We both knew that _this _officially never happened and mourned the loss of that perfect kiss and what might have been.

The memory hit me like a train. What did that mean? Am I in love with my foster sister? Why was I thinking about killing that boy just to see blood? What on earth is wrong with me? At least this means that perhaps I'll get my full memory back. Other questions start forming in my mind. Why was I adopted? What happened to my birth parents? What is my job? Where is Harrison's mother?

Deb has returned with a nurse. It must be my lucky day I'm getting morphine. As soon as the nurse leaves I begin to question Deb again with just the tip of the iceberg I'm imagining. Since I'm getting slightly loopy from the morphine I decide I might as well make the most of it dive in so to speak and ask about the memory. "Deb, I remembered something," I begin very quietly. I get an immediate response.

"That's great! What'd you remember?" She seems very happy at the mere thought of me remembering something or anything really, kind of was like a kid on Christmas.

"Well we were teenagers," I begin still rather unsure of how I'm going to bring this up. "You were crying, then your ex showed up and I got in a fight with him." I watch her carefully as I say this. She seems surprised that I'm talking about this, she nods that she remembers it. "You took care of me after the fight and," I can't believe I'm actually this nervous "and we kissed." She looks at me quietly her eyes sparkling.

"Yes we did," is her response it is little more than a whisper. Many emotions are running across her face most of which I can not identify. I can tell she isn't ready to talk about this.

After a moment of silence I ask, "Why was I adopted? And what happened to my birth parents?"

Deb looks very upset as soon as the questions leave my mouth, almost conflicted as to whether or not to tell me the truth. "Harry our father found you at a crime scene when you were three. Your mother had been his CI and was trying to help him bring down a drug dealer. But the dealer found out and decided to make an example out of her. So they took her and her two sons to a shipping container. Then they killed her with a chainsaw and left you and your brother there. Harry found you after you'd been there for two days." She looks heartbroken for me as she said this. "Your bio dad died of a heart attack a few years ago, and your brother," she pauses and bites her lip this is really difficult for her. "Your brother committed suicide."

"Wow that is a bit to take in." I mutter softly. Deb just looks at me clearly pained that she had to be the one to tell me my tragic beginnings. At least I know now. It is probably why I wanted to kill that boy so badly to see blood, after all who could witness that and walk away without any issues. I now know that there are several questions that Deb will probably not know the answer to. The biggest are am I capable of murder? Have I actually killed someone?

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Deb's POV

Most fucking likely the absolute worst conversation of my life, I hated telling Dexter about his past before the Morgan family. Then the fucking cherry on top of all the fucking things during the course of our lives to remember he remembers that kiss.

That _kiss _that I had blocked out so well before therapy. We had never spoken of it, not once. There were other moments that were up there with that kiss that we shared but that was the first. That was the day I knew Dex loved me, whether or not he said it didn't really matter after that afternoon. He had shown it, proved it when he beat up my boyfriend for disrespecting me and stopped hitting him simply because I asked him to. It was honestly the first time I've ever felt special, that I mattered so much to him that insulting me provoked the calmest person I know to violence.

It is already fucking morning daylight is blinding when you're this tired. I only got maybe three hours before Dex woke up. Oh well any amount of sleep lost is worth having him awake again. There really aren't words to describe how fucking much I missed him. How badly I need him in my life.

Oh fuck my life, the doctor apparently told that Dex had woken up because there looks like to be the beginning of a parade outside in the hallway. Whatever happened to doctor patient confidentiality? Alright I admit it I really hate doctors, I have ever since my mom died and I'm probably being a bit harsh but seriously this is ridiculous. Batista and Hernandez must have found out since they're patients still. They and their families are waiting to be asked in, clearly excited to see sleeping beauty.

"Hey socio," Angel greets as he enters the room. He has a huge smile on his face, it's really fucking weird to see him in a wheel chair but he did take one to the leg.

I remember after a slightly awkward silent moment that Dex doesn't have his memory, so I get up out of my chair and approach Angel, the officer and their families. I tell them of the not so good news about their hero. They look as though they've been slapped in the face with the news. But it didn't matter much to them if he didn't remember them or saving their lives, he was still Batman Superman and Santa all rolled into one to them.

Angel rolled over to the bed looked Dex right in the eye and said, "Socio you may not remember but I will never forget what you have done for me and my family. I wouldn't be here today if it wasn't for you." Dex doesn't know what to do but he offers his hand. The hard boiled homicide sergeant looks like he is going to cry, he takes Dexter's hand and they shake hands. "You need anything you tell me socio."

Officer Alex Hernandez doesn't know Dex. I myself had barely met him the day of the bust. He is a young officer in his early twenties with a young family. He looks at Dex with a respect that I've only seen a few times in my life. Starring straight into Dexter's eyes he says "Sir, you may not remember me. But that does not matter because I have never met you before. We have never said two words to each other until now. When you met me I was as good as dead, you saw that and you saved my life. You stopped me from bleeding to death and didn't leave me where I lay. You dragged me to safety and said exactly what the paramedics would need to know. It would have been so easy for you to leave me to die. I owe you everything. The words thank you is just not enough." With that the officer hugged Dex. I could tell the cop was close to tears and it was impressive that only the families were crying at this point.

Dex was clearly beyond uncomfortable and didn't know what to do or say. But after about ten or fifteen minutes he relaxed a bit and the conversation wasn't so serious. Everyone was just joking and laughing about stupid stuff. The way it should be. About an hour into the goof fest that had erupted in the small hospital room more visitors arrived. LaGuerta and Matthews to be exact and once again I find myself explaining the memory loss. They look worried which I expected from Matthews but worry is a human emotion and I didn't think LaGuerta was capable of it.

Matthews pulls me aside for a minute and tells me that both Dexter and I are going to get medals then he informs me that I can have another two weeks if I need it to help Dex remember. With that he turned and looked at Dex and told him "If you ever get bored with forensics than let me know and we will get you switched into the force, you'll have to go through the police academy but I'll see to it that it is expedited for you. Also I'll make sure you start off as a detective in homicide. I'd be honored to have you on the force Dexter."

No one in the room could believe what Matthews had just said, but it made sense since Dex is a hero and good at solving cases. Still I couldn't help but say "Holy shit" which everyone just laughed at of course.

* * *

Dexter's POV

So apparently I'm in forensics, I wonder why I didn't just become a cop. Well maybe now is my chance I politely let Matthews know that I will think about it. Unless there is some reason I should keep doing forensics I think I'd like police work better. But I'm going to have to wait on it after all there is a reason for everything.

Deb is being very quiet and is watching me very carefully I don't know whether I like it or not. But it is definitely better than the cops I guess I saved and their families. They're looking at me with such…I guess admiration it is a bit frightening. I'm fairly certain I could ask them to rob a bank and they'd do it. But the distraction is welcomed none the less. Whenever I look at Deb since that memory came back all I want is to repeat that kiss.

Angel keeps patting me on the shoulder and shaking my hand, I suppose he wants to hug me but can't and is using it as a substitute. I had a memory of him come back to me when he first entered the room. It isn't terribly useful, of all things it is that he likes bear claws when I get doughnuts. I feel very out of place and uncomfortable with this many people around.

More and more people keep coming to visit me. Hopefully when Deb takes me home tonight they'll all leave me alone for awhile. Especially the idiots that think talking slowly or yelling their names are is going to make me magically remember. Of all the people that have visited me today the guy the called Vince is the most offensive, annoying, and puzzling. I only say puzzling because he didn't seem to mean one word he said, it was as if he was an actor playing a part. Something inside of me is making me very suspicious of him.

* * *

A/N: Well I hope you guys liked the chapter. Please review so that I can improve for future chapters. I tried to show some of Dexter's past homicidal tendencies while creating some of the foundation of a love story between him and Debra. I know I only hit the tip of the iceberg but I wanted Dexter to start to realize that there is something abnormal about himself and his beginnings.


End file.
